audience: astarion

[mygod]

Comments

week 1, monday

[mygod]

[ the crow will eventually lead famine to astarion's lil house which famine will enter without knocking. rudeass ]

Did you need to make your request all the way out here.

[haematocritical]

[ it's fine, he broke in anyway. ]

I didn't know these had bathing facilities until I broke in. [ so. yes. get those steps in. ]

[mygod]

And now that you know, can I leave?

[ imagine if they just arrived and left instantly ]

[haematocritical]

[ that would be funny. ]

After coming all this way? [ No. ]

I was going to ask about soap. Surely it'd be a benefit to the rest of you if we stopped smelling like the worst end of a swamp every time we summoned you.

[mygod]

Some of you have asked for soap and share, but it's true that most of you do stink something awful.

Your scent dropper only covering up the worst of it?

[haematocritical]

Unfortunately when your only bathing facility has leeches in….

[ unpleasant. ]

That’s like a perfume. It’ll help, but it won’t fix the issue long term. [ he has more than enough experience of being stinky and traveling but at least they did have soap and unleeched rivers to help out in. ]

[mygod]

Then anticipate another delivery next week.

[ hope they still have running water then ]

[haematocritical]

[ oh, well. goody. he’ll take it.

he nods, because getting astarion to say thank you is like pulling teeth at some points ]

Until then, what— is the unofficial request “do your best with what you have” this week? The water runs at least. [ and he actually has no idea if staring at war until he gets to use the nice bathroom again is still an available option now the npcs have cult eyes on them harder than before. ]

[mygod]

Others have made requests for bathroom essentials. Though I cannot tell you who, perhaps they might take pity on you if you emit a particularly terrible odor.

[haematocritical]

I’m sure I can find them and tide myself over until soap arrives.

[ … ]

Where is this place, anyway? Yes, I’m sure there’s magic involved in how we’re here— but where is it?

[mygod]

You’re asking a question I do not have an answer to, as we also did not anticipate the appearance of this island.

[haematocritical]

Oh, so we're just parading around a potentially hostile mystery land. Wonderful.

[ also big 'why the fuck not' energy coming from him now. there are showers here. ]

Likely to vanish as fast as it arrived, I take it.

[mygod]

I wouldn’t get too comfortable here, no. Take what you care to keep before it disappears.

[haematocritical]

...



Can these things be removed? [ he does actually mean the whole shower ]

[mygod]

You should try and find out.

[ the answer is no ]

[haematocritical]

[ he looks like he's really thinking about it. ]

[mygod]

[ crosses their arms and takes a step back to wait and watch ]

[haematocritical]

[ well now he doesn't want to. ]

Now it jsut feels like a trap.

[mygod]

I'm merely observing to see what you come up with.

[haematocritical]

[ this still feels like a trap. danger danger. ]

Hmm...

[ actually is there soap and stuff in the animal crossing shower? ]

[mygod]

[ there is but it cannot be stolen ]

[haematocritical]

[ boo. ]

I suppose I’ll just have to make the most of this while it’s still here. [ wait ] This place isn’t going to vanish while we’re still here, is it?

[mygod]

[ laughs ]

Now that'd be funny. That's one way to lose half of our sacrifices in one fell swoop.

[haematocritical]

It would probably serve the cult at large right, but I don't relish the idea of being-- [ hm. ]

Torn out of existence? Teleported?

[mygod]

Hard to say. Maybe lost forever, on this quaint little island.