audience: laudna

[mygod]

Comments

[undread]

I know I can be hostile.

[a little nasty smile spreading across her face.]

Just because I'm not choosing to be right this moment doesn't mean I've decided against it. But if I kill you later on, the flowers will make me a little sad, I think.

[they might have been joking but that shit would work on her.]

[mygod]

[They do not seem perturbed by this. The hair-ripping moment took them by surprise, but they're apparently fine now.]

Is that so? Then I'm looking forward to your gift and your efforts. For the record, if you do decide that we're working for the other side, I would be the easiest to kill of the four of us.

[undread]

Really? Why?

[mygod]

[They shake their cane a little, speaking academically.]

I'm more agile than I look, but not by much. Impaired vision. Can't taste anything. Healing magic historically doesn't work very well on my body. Always been pretty weak in general too, I guess. I don't really care to fight.

So, pretty easy, right?

[undread]

Well. That depends. All of that would certainly make you less effective physically, but is there anything else you can do?

[mygod]

Hm... I'm a doctor. I can synthesize medicines that can push the body far beyond its limits. It's useful, if strenuous.

But the point is I wouldn't fight back against you. Of course, you don't have to believe that.

[undread]

[she goes still for a moment.]

I don't want to kill someone who doesn't fight back. But if you're lying to us, I won't have a choice.

[mygod]

[They mull over the wording.]

I'd expect that if we're lying, you'd want to kill us. Or do you feel it's your obligation? An inevitability?

[undread]

I will want to, yes. I'll be too angry to stop.

[mygod]

Good that you know that about yourself. Or perhaps I should apologize that you've had to learn.

In any case, I am the last person who would stop someone seeking revenge. How complimentary we are.

[undread]

[shifting immediately back to cheerful.]

If we don't wind up becoming enemies, perhaps we'll be the best of friends.

[mygod]

[Their tone is unchanged from its usual soft dryness, like sand.]

Right. Friends based on a mutual understanding of near inevitable vengeance.

We're even getting each other presents.

[That's what friends do.]

[undread]

Yes!

[sincerely?]

So often, I think the difference between a friend and an enemy comes down to whether your interests align.

[mygod]

[They regard her curiously.]

Is it? Where does personal loyalty fall into that?

[undread]

I'm afraid I don't understand.

[in part because she means something slightly less pragmatic than the ability to switch sides.]

I mean that there are people I've hated, deeply, who I know I could have loved in another life. It wasn't meant to be, because the things they wanted would have hurt other people I love. And there are people I know to be good people, who I could and perhaps should care for, but I don't, because without meaning to they hurt me.

[mygod]

So it all comes down to you and yours. Not good or evil.

[They tap their fingers against their crutch, sounding distant.]

You're probably in the moral wrong, and not better off for it. But it's natural. A good person took a great deal from me, for reasons they couldn't control. They were a victim, undeniably. I still didn't let it go until recently. I don't think many people are that forgiving.

[undread]

[pokes your dead npc]

...Yes. One took a great deal from me, too. She didn't intend for it to happen, but I died because of her. Because of all of them. And they're so kind, and sorry, but I don't know if I forgive them. They got to be happy, afterwards.

[mygod]

[ ripperoni!! ]

Some people just seem destined to be saved. And happy. [ they cant their head a little in thought. ] I wonder what everyone else is supposed to do. I stopped caring. But I never exactly figured out how to move on.

Let me know if you do.

[undread]

[unfortunately this makes her like him so much just in time for die.]

I haven't solved it, either. Perhaps neither of us will, and we'll simply have to be angry forever. Would that be so bad? Someone ought to be.

[mygod]

[ ): that's why you shouldn't like people. ]

You think so? [ they don't seem like they have the energy to agree or refute this very strongly. ] I guess. I never thought of it as a karma, but maybe that's what anger is.

Aren't you tired though?

[undread]

[so true bestie.]

I think once I'm tired, and I'm satisfied to stop feeling so intensely, that will likely be the day I pass on. [something has to keep her going.]

[mygod]

...Maybe.

[ that sounds sincere. ]

Rage is very good at keeping you trundling forward, if nothing else. Are you avoiding that? The end of things. Your body looks like it could go on forever.

[undread]

[hmm...]

I've kept going for a long time, at least. But part of that wasn't of my own choosing. Some of it is my own will, and some of it is Delilah, and the power of her god keeping her alive through me.

For now, I'd like to keep going to see through the defeat of the people who would hurt my friends. Hurt Imogen. And then... I don't know what will happen.

[she does know, though, actually. and the ink on her body just reads Delilah over and over again.]

[mygod]

[ a moment passes in silence as they watch the ink spread, repetitive and eerie.

they seem a little cautious about asking, but eventually do. ]

...So you're after this Ludinus person. But who is Delilah?

[undread]

An old acquaintance. I suppose her soul happens to be trapped with mine.