Imogen has always been affected by strange powers. Ruidus-born, a child of superstition, with the ability to hear thoughts and access a well of untethered magic. The entity she draws that power from is dark, and she's been encouraged by many to give into that darkness in order to unlock her true strength.
For a long time, both she and I were partners in resisting these calls - her from her dreams, me from Delilah. But then we experienced a series of losses. The world became too dangerous for us to hold ourselves back. We discussed and decided that we should both agree to give into our darkness, and act as the tether to one another as best we can.
[maybe it seems reckless, but.]
If we don't succeed in stopping these people, it won't matter anyway. We'll be dead. The world will be unrecognizable, perhaps all mortals will be doomed.
But recently, she met her mother again. And she saw how deeply she has changed, also under the sway of Ruidus. So I think it made her change her mind, and have reservations. And we no longer see eye to eye, but she is the one who changed her outlook, not I.
[ oh. so they were both doing a bad idea, and then imogen realized it was a bad idea.
pestilence considers what to say, but also it's sunday, so i'm giving you a memshare.
You are in a forest.
It is somewhere that you know barely anyone has traveled to, as most can barely tolerate the harsh, colder climate this north. You also shiver a bit through your clothes, even though you came prepared to deal with this kind of weather. Still, you press on, because that cannot stop you.
You have been searching through the area for quite some time now. There are no maps, no witnesses, no markings-- it has just been trial and error for weeks as you try to pinpoint a people who do not wish to be found. But you believe you have, this time. You have to believe it.
Your journey stops at a large tree. The front of it is completely wrapped in vines and other foliage, and you have to examine it very closely to be able to notice that there is space you can look into. It is some kind of entrance. You place your hand on the tree and close your eyes.
"Heya," you say to it. "Would you mind letting me in? I'm just visiting."
The tree is silent, before eventually speaking back, "You do not live here."
Whoa, a guard dog. It almost makes you laugh, "Sorry, sorry! I promise to be quick. Pretty please?"
The tree does not respond again, but with a heavy sigh, the vines move just enough that you are able to slip through the space that was not made. You give the tree your thanks and continue down the newly uncovered path. As you move, your nerves start to eat away at you. Is this fine? The chance of you simply finding nothing is so unbelievably high, and you are unsure if you can face another heartbreak like that. The idea of it tears at you, making you stop a few times, but you always force yourself to keep moving. You must get some sort of answer.
It feels like an eternity of walking. Your feet hurt. It is less cold in here, but the chill doesn't stop persisting, so you still tug your jacket closer anyway. You begin to doubt, again, that you went to the right place, even though all signs point that you are finally right. You think about these things so much your head hurts.
And then you see them.
Elves.
There are only a few, at least here, and they all stop when they see you. You also stop, and are unable to think of what to say. A greeting. A speech. Anything. All those years of doing presentations and running meetings and sitting through interviews, and your words fail you now.
Finally, you manage. "Hello! I'm... I'm one of you."
They stare at you. One opens their mouth, and you realize you do not understand what they are saying. What language is this? Your ears twitch as you struggle to recognize anything.
I... haven't spent much time around them. Despite -
[she gestures to her ears.]
Cosmetic! They did it to me when I died. [the only full elf she's really spent a lot of time lately, other than essek now i suppose, is ludinus, and he's a nightmare.] Where I'm from, the stereotype, at least for full high elves, is quite, mm, reclusive. [arrogant, really.] I suppose it's much the same?
You see, where I'm from, there's an illness that's very prominent all over the world. It's terminal if you catch it, but for most people, it'll take a long time before it kills you, especially if you're getting treatment.
[ they point at themself. ]
If I got it, treatment wouldn't even work. It's even deadlier for elves, to the point that most people aren't even aware they exist. The race is almost completely extinct, except for small pockets that are hiding here and there, so they don't catch it.
We tried. It was just a thing of... you can be the same, but your experiences put such a divide between you that the hurdle to overcome it makes you think, why?
Imogen always wanted to find people who understood the powers she was born with. But when she did find them, they were quite evil! I think it was a great disappointment to her. For me, I spent so much time in my youth hoping I'd find a powerful mage to train me, and when I thought it was finally going to happen, instead I was betrayed and murdered. So I don't tend to have high hopes for expectations... but it was still a letdown.
The idea of finding a place where one belongs and will be understood is a beautiful one, but I suspect that place is more easily found among people who aren't quite like you but choose to stay with you.
[pesto...that's so cute. she smiles a little bit at that, but doesn't push too hard.]
Well. We don't have to be emotional about it for me to say I do understand. At least, I was alone for a very long time. And maybe I'll get left behind again. [things with her friends aren't going so hot, as pesto saw...] Maybe it's not even the people who choose to stay, so much as the ones who are important to us for a little while. At least, I've been very happy for the past few years, even if it doesn't work out in the long run.
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I don't like confrontation very much. I don't like to disagree with Imogen.
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No one wants to disagree with their loved ones, Laudna. It's really stressful!
Would that be the only reason you wouldn't argue with her in that situation though?
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How have you tried explaining it?
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Imogen has always been affected by strange powers. Ruidus-born, a child of superstition, with the ability to hear thoughts and access a well of untethered magic. The entity she draws that power from is dark, and she's been encouraged by many to give into that darkness in order to unlock her true strength.
For a long time, both she and I were partners in resisting these calls - her from her dreams, me from Delilah. But then we experienced a series of losses. The world became too dangerous for us to hold ourselves back. We discussed and decided that we should both agree to give into our darkness, and act as the tether to one another as best we can.
[maybe it seems reckless, but.]
If we don't succeed in stopping these people, it won't matter anyway. We'll be dead. The world will be unrecognizable, perhaps all mortals will be doomed.
But recently, she met her mother again. And she saw how deeply she has changed, also under the sway of Ruidus. So I think it made her change her mind, and have reservations. And we no longer see eye to eye, but she is the one who changed her outlook, not I.
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pestilence considers what to say, but also it's sunday, so i'm giving you a memshare.
pestilence winces. ]
Sorry for the interruption.
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she frowns when pesto winces as the memory ends.]
...It's alright. [she's not sure whether she's supposed to comment on what she saw.] You were looking for them for such a long time.
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[ they go quiet for a moment. ]
That was actually my first time meeting other elves. That I can remember, anyway. I wasn't sure what to expect.
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[she gestures to her ears.]
Cosmetic! They did it to me when I died. [the only full elf she's really spent a lot of time lately, other than essek now i suppose, is ludinus, and he's a nightmare.] Where I'm from, the stereotype, at least for full high elves, is quite, mm, reclusive. [arrogant, really.] I suppose it's much the same?
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You see, where I'm from, there's an illness that's very prominent all over the world. It's terminal if you catch it, but for most people, it'll take a long time before it kills you, especially if you're getting treatment.
[ they point at themself. ]
If I got it, treatment wouldn't even work. It's even deadlier for elves, to the point that most people aren't even aware they exist. The race is almost completely extinct, except for small pockets that are hiding here and there, so they don't catch it.
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...That's awful. Were they willing to let you in, despite that? Or give the potential for spreading the illness, were they reluctant?
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So I left. But at least now I know they're there.
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[ they pause, then shake their head. ]
It mostly just felt like losing something.
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Imogen always wanted to find people who understood the powers she was born with. But when she did find them, they were quite evil! I think it was a great disappointment to her. For me, I spent so much time in my youth hoping I'd find a powerful mage to train me, and when I thought it was finally going to happen, instead I was betrayed and murdered. So I don't tend to have high hopes for expectations... but it was still a letdown.
The idea of finding a place where one belongs and will be understood is a beautiful one, but I suspect that place is more easily found among people who aren't quite like you but choose to stay with you.
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[ they make a slight face. ]
This is so grossly emotional.
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Well. We don't have to be emotional about it for me to say I do understand. At least, I was alone for a very long time. And maybe I'll get left behind again. [things with her friends aren't going so hot, as pesto saw...] Maybe it's not even the people who choose to stay, so much as the ones who are important to us for a little while. At least, I've been very happy for the past few years, even if it doesn't work out in the long run.
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they will reach out and grab her hand. ]
Remembering the good times, and the impact that they left with us? I guess that really is all we get left with, anyway. The little marks others make.
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Yes, I think so. To enjoy it while we have it, even if it won't last.
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[ it's said with a laugh though. ]
... I guess it's just what we'll have to do for now.