the pause they give is full of hesitation and uncertainty. this is wild to hear honestly. ]
I do not... believe that is very true, but I won't argue with you right now about it.
[ their day..... THEIR WEEK. ]
It is very... disorienting and worrisome to suddenly consider things... like other people's feelings, or far-reaching consequences of actions. I do think my life was much less complicated without...... friends.
[ it's cool its cool sorry that you're a big squishy softie and everyone fucking knows it bud ]
Hah! I suppose I can relate. I really didn't have anyone but ... colleagues and acquaintances until quite recently. Excluding dear Tara, of course.
Mystra was my closest companion, and I don't know that she ever understood anything about a mortal's emotions. And I found people to be difficult to decipher, as if I was speaking a different coded language from the rest of the world that they had not chosen to inform me of. But I think what I've learned is that loneliness can kill as efficiently as any blade. At least the parts of yourself that truly matter, in the end.
I assure you I am as complex as they come. [ this is joking, but with an air of teasing arrogance, of course. ] The complexity is less what's disturbing.
Things were fine and went smoothly when it was only myself. Like you, except there were no colleagues or acquaintances, and certainly not any divine companionship.
[ but now there are fucking all these water bottles to be responsible for?! ]
[ he'll snort at the joke, waving a hand at him. ]
You most certainly are.
[ and sorry, he keeps laughing a little. ]
Did it go fine and smoothly ... ? You've just described making an error that seems to cause you quite a bit of distress, so I question that assessment. And as for my divine companionship, I'd hardly envy that portion. Look where I've ended up.
Well, at the time, nothing was amiss, or going poorly. It wasn't until certain people began meddling where they didn't belong that things began to get messy.
[ this is happening all over again sorta now. in a way. ]
If you could change that part of your past, would you at all?
[ okay sure just blame [redacted] for ALL your problems, bud. anyway sorry rude assholes keep ruining your life. it will happen again. ]
With Mystra? [ ... ] It is hard to ... When I think on it now, I am filled with a great deal of regret and shame. But that is the kind of assessment one needs a degree of time to sort through, I think.
I certainly wouldn't be where I am at this moment. I wouldn't have met the people I've come to care about, or seen the world the way I understand it to be now. It is as you say - knowing people, having friends, adds complexity. It makes that question very hard to answer.
speaking of embarrassing since its still sunday and affection week gale will reach over to just. squeeze them on the arm and then sort of be like oops maybe that was too much and put his hands behind his back instead. weirdo behavior. ]
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the pause they give is full of hesitation and uncertainty. this is wild to hear honestly. ]
I do not... believe that is very true, but I won't argue with you right now about it.
[ their day..... THEIR WEEK. ]
It is very... disorienting and worrisome to suddenly consider things... like other people's feelings, or far-reaching consequences of actions. I do think my life was much less complicated without...... friends.
no subject
Hah! I suppose I can relate. I really didn't have anyone but ... colleagues and acquaintances until quite recently. Excluding dear Tara, of course.
Mystra was my closest companion, and I don't know that she ever understood anything about a mortal's emotions. And I found people to be difficult to decipher, as if I was speaking a different coded language from the rest of the world that they had not chosen to inform me of. But I think what I've learned is that loneliness can kill as efficiently as any blade. At least the parts of yourself that truly matter, in the end.
Complexity is not something to be afraid of.
no subject
I assure you I am as complex as they come. [ this is joking, but with an air of teasing arrogance, of course. ] The complexity is less what's disturbing.
Things were fine and went smoothly when it was only myself. Like you, except there were no colleagues or acquaintances, and certainly not any divine companionship.
[ but now there are fucking all these water bottles to be responsible for?! ]
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You most certainly are.
[ and sorry, he keeps laughing a little. ]
Did it go fine and smoothly ... ? You've just described making an error that seems to cause you quite a bit of distress, so I question that assessment. And as for my divine companionship, I'd hardly envy that portion. Look where I've ended up.
[ single and exploded. ]
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[ this is happening all over again sorta now. in a way. ]
If you could change that part of your past, would you at all?
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With Mystra? [ ... ] It is hard to ... When I think on it now, I am filled with a great deal of regret and shame. But that is the kind of assessment one needs a degree of time to sort through, I think.
I certainly wouldn't be where I am at this moment. I wouldn't have met the people I've come to care about, or seen the world the way I understand it to be now. It is as you say - knowing people, having friends, adds complexity. It makes that question very hard to answer.
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I understand. I think the answer to your question sounds very much like a "no, I don't think I would."
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[ the part he would take back is the Blowing Up. but probably not anything else, for better or worse. ]
... Thank you for telling me a bit about yourself too. I know it can be difficult.
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what do they say to this??? don't just say something soft and leave it open for them to meet halfway, embarrassing. ]
A bit of poor timing for it, but...
[ they nod. ]
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speaking of embarrassing since its still sunday and affection week gale will reach over to just. squeeze them on the arm and then sort of be like oops maybe that was too much and put his hands behind his back instead. weirdo behavior. ]
Hardly, I did ask.
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they glance down, but don't try to pull their arm away. ]
You did ask.