[ trying and failing not to appear proud of his "not bad." this is like passing the "how am i holding up in your estimations" test from Shadowheart. a hard-won victory from an Unpleasant Queen. ]
Likely so. The rest of us are obviously under more scrutiny now, so we'll see how we fare. I'll have to learn how to more actively be a villain, rather than just accepting the title passively.
Oh, I don't know. I understand it, I think. I had a rebellious streak, though it manifested in quite a different way. I suppose instead of violence it was disobedience to my tutors and masters, and an utter disregard for safe casting practices.
[ he catches that misstep, but just frowns a little. poor death. ]
You do keep repeating the need for us to not concern ourselves with your lot, but we're all rather tied together at this point, don't you think? One of us, one of you.
But no, I don't think so. Death was the dour one who would always something depressing like 'I am but a resource to you', or whatever... but I understand the sentiment. We do not need to grow friendly to be productive.
Look after your own lives and each other, rather than feel worry over people who are part of the problem that brought you here.
Youth, arrogance, insecurity, any mixture of things.
[ another half-shrug. ]
I honestly don't know how much control we will have over any of that. Our lives, each other, any of this. If we're to randomly turn into monsters at the drop of a hat, then there hardly any avoiding harm is there?
I can only grasp an understanding of one of those.
[ guess which one ]
Not to be grim, but most of life is never knowing when you might die, isn't it? The options available to you might be slim now, but it is not fated to always remain the same. You may not have control now, but may not be the case forever, especially since that is what we three are looking to restore.
Not my life. As Chosen, even as just an Archmage, one is granted knowledge that can in certain ways trivialize death. After all, the study of magic is one that can take place over centuries, not mere human decades. When I lost that, I was reduced back to the years granted any other mortal. And when I lost that with the introduction of the Netherese Orb, I was reduced to ... counted days. A measure of hours, even. I knew the exact moment of my death was approaching and was utterly terrified for it. Whatever it is I have now is borrowed time, though what I am borrowing against remains to be seen.
In theory, but without knowing where we are and to what extent our souls can travel from here, I can only make certain extrapolations. I expect this ritual is intended to capture souls, a rather common offering to a god of any nature.
Normally, upon death, you would find your soul now separated from the physical and returning to the Fugue Plane. From there it gets more complex, but as I've said, I don't know that getting to the Fugue Plane is even a possibility from here. I expect our fate here is to be consumed.
The Fugue Plane... There are so many of you who actually know what comes after death in your realms, I'm surprised. For myself, there is only speculation and uncertainty with no confirmation.
So I've always assumed the answer is nothing. Everyone becomes nothing.
I would not declare every mystery of the places beyond mortal death to be solved. For example, where does a soul dedicated to a goddess that wants nothing to do with him end up?
[ so, there's a good bit of mystery left. ]
Maybe there is something to not knowing every answer of what lies beyond. Though admittedly, I'd prefer it not be nothing. Besides, we come from somewhere surely. The source must draw from some well.
In some ways I agree. In others, I don't. The body exists to house the brain and the heart. Without it, and without those organs functioning, does the person continue to exist? I am not opposed to being wrong, though I know that if the idea is that you will either be saved by a higher power or rotting in the flames of the underworld—I know I will be in the latter.
Do you think there will ever be a point in your life where you do not fear death?
Well, in my experience, yes. You can reconstruct the flesh, and return a soul to it long after it has fled - provided it is willing and able. Such things are difficult and often complex, but it's possible. And I'd avoid being condemned to the Hells, Karlach has quite a few disturbing stories.
[ hell is also very real in dnd world! but probably is not as easy to get to as simply being a bad person.
he blinks at the question though, and then seems a little awkward, bringing a hand up to chew at a nail. ]
You talk as if I have a future to experience such things.
Hmm... I have known men who would be willing to tear the world apart just to see someone again. [ a beat ] It is for the best that such a practice is uncommon, no offense to the undead woman among you.
[ laudna seems nice
but at the question, famine shrugs ]
You could. The wish is available to you, should you seek to find your monster partner. Or, if you survive all this, then surely your mind or someone else's would be able to come up with a way to save you before your soul is returned to wherever it might've come from.
It would be a shame to make it past this cult only to still die.
Mm. And there are often complexities with the difference between true resurrection and undeath. To return wholly to one’s body is one thing, to be arisen from the grave through less than certain means is another. Those who might tear a world apart may see themselves disappointed. There can be changes. I doubt our friends Laudna and Astarion are exactly the people they were before their demise, nor do they remember.
[ did he just out astarion as undead. oops. its fine. ]
Then to answer your question … I’m not sure.
[ sometimes you have clinical wizard depression and swing pretty wildly between certain extremes. ]
[ wow learned something new about astarion today ]
I believe there are ways to defy death, but it is not painless. And I do not believe, ultimately, that it should be done at all. Though I also won't tell the undead to die again just because I disagree with the circumstances of their creation.
[ anyway, ]
Well. I suppose I also know a thing or two about greed, so I cannot blame you.
[ they are not concerned with it. though they laugh a little bit at the congaline of glowing descriptors ]
I'm also brilliant, competent, and more prone to saving others than destroying them, so I believe that does negate most of the other aspects. [ does it. what kind of girl math is this ] But I'd rather not have people paint too flattering of a picture of me when they are making their assumptions.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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[ trying and failing not to appear proud of his "not bad." this is like passing the "how am i holding up in your estimations" test from Shadowheart. a hard-won victory from an Unpleasant Queen. ]
Ah. So it was an example made.
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Likely so. The rest of us are obviously under more scrutiny now, so we'll see how we fare. I'll have to learn how to more actively be a villain, rather than just accepting the title passively.
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[ oh no ............. ]
They will be expecting more of you then.
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[ absolutely hilarious ori behavior ]
But they will. That's for us f—three to concern ourselves with, though.
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[ he catches that misstep, but just frowns a little. poor death. ]
You do keep repeating the need for us to not concern ourselves with your lot, but we're all rather tied together at this point, don't you think? One of us, one of you.
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[ can't relate.... ]
But no, I don't think so. Death was the dour one who would always something depressing like 'I am but a resource to you', or whatever... but I understand the sentiment. We do not need to grow friendly to be productive.
Look after your own lives and each other, rather than feel worry over people who are part of the problem that brought you here.
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[ another half-shrug. ]
I honestly don't know how much control we will have over any of that. Our lives, each other, any of this. If we're to randomly turn into monsters at the drop of a hat, then there hardly any avoiding harm is there?
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[ guess which one ]
Not to be grim, but most of life is never knowing when you might die, isn't it? The options available to you might be slim now, but it is not fated to always remain the same. You may not have control now, but may not be the case forever, especially since that is what we three are looking to restore.
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Not my life. As Chosen, even as just an Archmage, one is granted knowledge that can in certain ways trivialize death. After all, the study of magic is one that can take place over centuries, not mere human decades. When I lost that, I was reduced back to the years granted any other mortal. And when I lost that with the introduction of the Netherese Orb, I was reduced to ... counted days. A measure of hours, even. I knew the exact moment of my death was approaching and was utterly terrified for it. Whatever it is I have now is borrowed time, though what I am borrowing against remains to be seen.
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[ asked in the tone of someone who once again cannot relate, but is at least quietly curious ]
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Of course.
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[ they have been having this conversation so much lately wonder why ]
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Normally, upon death, you would find your soul now separated from the physical and returning to the Fugue Plane. From there it gets more complex, but as I've said, I don't know that getting to the Fugue Plane is even a possibility from here. I expect our fate here is to be consumed.
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So I've always assumed the answer is nothing. Everyone becomes nothing.
[ thanks famine ]
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[ so, there's a good bit of mystery left. ]
Maybe there is something to not knowing every answer of what lies beyond. Though admittedly, I'd prefer it not be nothing. Besides, we come from somewhere surely. The source must draw from some well.
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In some ways I agree. In others, I don't. The body exists to house the brain and the heart. Without it, and without those organs functioning, does the person continue to exist? I am not opposed to being wrong, though I know that if the idea is that you will either be saved by a higher power or rotting in the flames of the underworld—I know I will be in the latter.
Do you think there will ever be a point in your life where you do not fear death?
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[ hell is also very real in dnd world! but probably is not as easy to get to as simply being a bad person.
he blinks at the question though, and then seems a little awkward, bringing a hand up to chew at a nail. ]
You talk as if I have a future to experience such things.
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[ laudna seems nice
but at the question, famine shrugs ]
You could. The wish is available to you, should you seek to find your monster partner. Or, if you survive all this, then surely your mind or someone else's would be able to come up with a way to save you before your soul is returned to wherever it might've come from.
It would be a shame to make it past this cult only to still die.
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[ did he just out astarion as undead. oops. its fine. ]
Then to answer your question … I’m not sure.
[ sometimes you have clinical wizard depression and swing pretty wildly between certain extremes. ]
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I believe there are ways to defy death, but it is not painless. And I do not believe, ultimately, that it should be done at all. Though I also won't tell the undead to die again just because I disagree with the circumstances of their creation.
[ anyway, ]
Well. I suppose I also know a thing or two about greed, so I cannot blame you.
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That and it'd be a touch rude ...
[ you can't just tell people to go die again. ]
You've mentioned along these lines, yes. All-knowing, arrogant, unpleasant, greedy. [ he sort of laughs. ] You're a bit harsh on yourself.
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[ they are not concerned with it. though they laugh a little bit at the congaline of glowing descriptors ]
I'm also brilliant, competent, and more prone to saving others than destroying them, so I believe that does negate most of the other aspects. [ does it. what kind of girl math is this ] But I'd rather not have people paint too flattering of a picture of me when they are making their assumptions.
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I suppose I hadn’t considered attributes of one’s personality to be balances on a chart, but I can see your logic.
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But I do think a person is made up of their flaws and their tolerable attributes altogether.