[ He smiles softly, a thoughtful expression coming over his gaze as he gives his response some thought. It feels silly, sharing something like this with a complete stranger, but he's done it before. ]
... Someone who, when my journey comes to an end, can look back and think that my life was one worth living.
[ they cross their arms and tilt their head, thinking on their answer ]
... Complete. Dull.
I was between personal projects, and had no new challenges left. Only mountains of paperwork for red tape that I didn't care to uphold. My life's work was finished and no one needed me for anything in particular. I actually think I was becoming a crutch that was hindering their growth the longer I stayed, because people will always rely on the powerful and familiar instead of exploring what they can become.
So I left when the opportunity for something new and interesting came up.
... Or maybe I'm wrong. He's been full of surprises since the beginning, so who's to say I really know him? [ Awkwardly backtracks. ] I guess I'm just thinking about the people from before coming here.
You are the only person who can make assessments like that for yourself. Though if the emotion is unfamiliar to you, it makes sense that it would take more time to parse.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
... Someone who, when my journey comes to an end, can look back and think that my life was one worth living.
no subject
What would your measure be to determine that? [ tilts head ] Wealth, legacy, love? Something else?
no subject
I guess that's what I'm trying to figure out for myself.
no subject
What has your life been filled with thus far? Process of elimination is an available strategy.
no subject
Gambling, mostly. Chasing after higher stakes, and then higher ones after that.
no subject
Oh? Adrenaline chasing? Did you enjoy it, or were you simply good at it?
no subject
You're really trying to get to know me.
no subject
I now find myself curious.
[ tilts head ]
I did not think that would be the question that would spook you.
no subject
Maybe I didn't think it was fair. I know so little about you, after all.
no subject
You may ask... three questions. If I decline to answer, you may change your question.
[ famine asked 6 so they said aventurine gets half ]
no subject
Let's start off easy with the first question. How old are you?
[ shakes ]
no subject
26. [ a beat ] And older than you.
[ how do they know this ]
no subject
Anyway. He is mystified by the second part, but he's already got another question in mind. ]
How long have you been with the cult that brought us here?
no subject
Hmm... A few months now?
no subject
... What was your life like before joining the cult?
no subject
... Complete. Dull.
I was between personal projects, and had no new challenges left. Only mountains of paperwork for red tape that I didn't care to uphold. My life's work was finished and no one needed me for anything in particular. I actually think I was becoming a crutch that was hindering their growth the longer I stayed, because people will always rely on the powerful and familiar instead of exploring what they can become.
So I left when the opportunity for something new and interesting came up.
no subject
You remind me of someone I know.
no subject
[ said in a tone that implies famine clearly thinks they're impossible to replicate ]
no subject
[ A small smile... Entirely sincere for once. ]
... Or maybe I'm wrong. He's been full of surprises since the beginning, so who's to say I really know him? [ Awkwardly backtracks. ] I guess I'm just thinking about the people from before coming here.
no subject
[ watches aventurine closely ]
I am only a doctor in my spare time. [ to clarify ] Do you find yourself missing them already? Those people you left behind.
no subject
... I must be... right? There's no reason I'd think of them otherwise.
[ He sounds so uncertain. ]
no subject
Under what circumstances did you leave them?
[ they have only caught bits and pieces ]
no subject
It's a complicated story. The short version of it is that... I died?
no subject
like this is a normal thing to hear ]
Will you be able to become alive again? Should you survive all this.
no subject
... I don't know. But... I hope so.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)