I understand to some degree that this is your level of conscientious for others.
[ . . . ]
But to have died, and to die again is heavy. We spoke of that too. And while I am here for you, I am not close enough to comfort you properly. I do not even know if I fully know how.
[ he's here for her to vent and cry and talk to, but he's not a warm person. he is too far to be truly one, even when he tries. he cannot hold her hand or be a shoulder for her to cry on, which he thinks she does need ]
You do not need have another level of loneliness to yourself. People will be sad, yes. But that is because they care about you, and think your life is worthwhile. Let them feel all of that, and let yourself feel it too.
We did. But you know I don't come to you for comfort, right? I never expected that from you. Not because I don't think you're capable of it—[that's also part of it, admittedly.]—but because it isn't in your job description to do so. I told you because you figured it out, and because I know you won't be sad about it in the way other people will be. You're pragmatic. And I appreciate that.
[he's also not wrong that she probably does actually need the same level of support she gives other people but, well, she has cloud who is doing his best. and she will in time tell a few other people.]
...do you know I think Yuffie would've willingly killed someone to secure a wish to save me? If she thought I wouldn't be extremely upset about it. Or that if Cloud and I hadn't gone together, he would have harmed more people himself because he wouldn't be able to process the grief? [...] I get it. Not everyone is that drastic. But maybe this is a level of loneliness I'm used to already.
[also pragmatically said, because sometimes you really do spend so much of your life alone and work through your own thoughts and issues because the few people around you you can trust can't fully relate or understand.]
Your child is a teenager whose brain hasn't developed equipped with a sharp object. And your man is an individual who is trying, but also has so much going on in his brain that he got defensive when I asked about it. You said it yourself that not everyone is them, and so uniquely incapable of helping.
[ they are trying their best and scien will acknowledge it but my god. he keeps having these conversations with people who are so used to taking care of others that they struggle to take care of themselves ]
I am not blaming you for not mentioning it this far—but it is something that you can take into your hands, and I support your decision to do so.
I am certain you will find yourself pleasantly surprised.
[okay well. the look on her face kind of goes "yeah, fair" and she shrugs a little. that is true. her child and her man both have problems.]
...I'll see what I can do, okay? I know you're right. And I'll happily tell you you're right when it turns out that way, but maybe I'll give it another couple of days. Weekends are always hard on everyone, and this one...
[...well. truthfully she doesn't have too many feelings about this particular weekend outside of her general sadness it happened, and frustration people are possessed, but you know.]
One thing at a time. But that's my progress report for you so far.
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no subject
[ . . . ]
But to have died, and to die again is heavy. We spoke of that too. And while I am here for you, I am not close enough to comfort you properly. I do not even know if I fully know how.
[ he's here for her to vent and cry and talk to, but he's not a warm person. he is too far to be truly one, even when he tries. he cannot hold her hand or be a shoulder for her to cry on, which he thinks she does need ]
You do not need have another level of loneliness to yourself. People will be sad, yes. But that is because they care about you, and think your life is worthwhile. Let them feel all of that, and let yourself feel it too.
no subject
[he's also not wrong that she probably does actually need the same level of support she gives other people but, well, she has cloud who is doing his best. and she will in time tell a few other people.]
...do you know I think Yuffie would've willingly killed someone to secure a wish to save me? If she thought I wouldn't be extremely upset about it. Or that if Cloud and I hadn't gone together, he would have harmed more people himself because he wouldn't be able to process the grief? [...] I get it. Not everyone is that drastic. But maybe this is a level of loneliness I'm used to already.
[also pragmatically said, because sometimes you really do spend so much of your life alone and work through your own thoughts and issues because the few people around you you can trust can't fully relate or understand.]
no subject
[ they are trying their best and scien will acknowledge it but my god. he keeps having these conversations with people who are so used to taking care of others that they struggle to take care of themselves ]
I am not blaming you for not mentioning it this far—but it is something that you can take into your hands, and I support your decision to do so.
I am certain you will find yourself pleasantly surprised.
no subject
...I'll see what I can do, okay? I know you're right. And I'll happily tell you you're right when it turns out that way, but maybe I'll give it another couple of days. Weekends are always hard on everyone, and this one...
[...well. truthfully she doesn't have too many feelings about this particular weekend outside of her general sadness it happened, and frustration people are possessed, but you know.]
One thing at a time. But that's my progress report for you so far.
no subject
We both know I'm right.
[ as long as that's the case, he's fine with it ]
Keep up the good work. Do some more.
no subject
[because he is right as it turns out, but unfortunately she will skip their regular saturday meeting and postpone to monday. wahoo.]