audience: astarion

[mygod]

Comments

[mygod]

[Oh No.]

You'll find me a boring partner.

[They gesture for him to follow, because they don't want to stand around.]

The leeches are native to the river. It's not their fault people have weaponized them.

[haematocritical]

[ we're old. ]

I've survived worse.

[ probably. ]

It's still concerning to open a coffin and find it full of leeches. No matter how innocent you think the leeches are.

[mygod]

I thought everyone who decides to sleep in a mortuary would be prepared for that sort of thing.

[They do not sound sympathetic. Why did so many of you pick mortuary.]

[haematocritical]

[ funny. ]

I don’t plan on sleeping there, thank you very much.

[ i hope the barn is ready for him haunting their second floor. ]

[mygod]

[Barn is somehow less stinky.]

Good luck finding room elsewhere.

I'll assume you're doing better than yesterday. [Astarion your cult-induced outburst.]

[haematocritical]

[ the stinky is there, it just isn’t old dried blood stinky. also i way i ran to my mod guess list because i was like is this an ester? (pepe silvias) ]

I’m persuasive.

[ he’ll just barge in there. ]

Oh, I’m just peachy. Wonderful, even. Never better. [ no. ]

[mygod]

[Three of us are ESTers, good luck]

Would you like to talk about it? [Said dryly.]

[haematocritical]

[ i know it’s very cursed. ]

I’m sure I’ll manage, as long as you don’t plan on shoving any weird little parasite an—

[ ……..

wait.




dramatic sigh. ]

Never mind, your little cult overlords already did that.

[mygod]

[Lil drama queen.]

I suppose they did, however inadvertently.

You've been through this song and dance already.

[haematocritical]

[ he will continue to go through this song and dance as much as he wants to, he will not be stopped. viva la revolution and all that.


he does, finally, fold his arms and zero his focus in a bit. ]

Alright, explain the whole finding your “other half” in a little more detail. It makes you more powerful, yes, but in what sort of way? Might as well see if the benefits to this silly little extra are truly worth it, if I’m going to be stuck with it.

[ he’s ignoring the ‘if you die they die and vice versa thing’ for the moment. ]

[mygod]

[They are pretty soft spoken to begin with, but their tone dips into something more removed and professional anyway.]

I couldn't predict exactly how, but it will probably affect the ability you have already. And in making the bond, you would generate the energy for a wish.

...Not one that would affect the machinations of the ritual. You couldn't wish for its premature end. But it's strong enough to affect your world back home, for instance.

[haematocritical]

[ … hmmm. ]

So, an effect but an unknown one so we’d be taking a gamble with that alone, and then the possibility to make a wish if we survive this place and manage to make it home.

[ … ]

That’s quite the weighted risk, especially if your “other half” ends up being an idiot who gets themselves immediately killed.

[mygod]

Almost right. That'd depend on your wish. Some might be contingent on surviving. Some of them, I don't see any reason why they wouldn't be granted right away.

But yes, it's a risk. One you'll have to weigh. Nothing comes without cost. All depends on how badly you want it, I suppose.

[haematocritical]

That's a fairly easy weigh up? I do like power. But I like not being sacrificed juuust a little more. It's a very personal hobby of mine.

[ ... ]

No way to get the power without tying yourself to the other person?

[mygod]

[They don't judge. It doesn't make a difference to Death whether they partner up or not.]

You'll have to be more specific in what you're thinking.

[haematocritical]

You have to confirm with the person who shares the same type as you, correct? If you don’t— nothing changes? There’s no loophole that you can use by knowing the other person but not telling them?

[mygod]

Greedy of you...

[They say this, but don't actually sound very judgmental. More like, unsurprised.]

Nothing like that, no. You're both putting your lives on the line, so it's only fair you both have to put your chips in. 'Fair' as it gets, anyway.

[haematocritical]

[ he just shrugs. like, yes and?

but the continuation has him sighing, a little put out. ]

A pity. The consequences are a bit too much in this case, I think. I'm not knowingly signing my own death warrant.

[mygod]

Suit yourself.

You can try to find other ways to help yourselves out of here. We're looking into it, but I doubt you all want to sit like sheep in a pen.

[haematocritical]

Running into the fog only does so much.

[ … ]

Well, if there’s something hiding under this village I suppose we’ll need shovels. [ and a will to dig. ]

[mygod]

[They wag their cane for a second.]

Sorry. You might have to recruit the others for manual labor.

Is that your request for the week? A shovel? [They sound sooooo serious about this.]

[haematocritical]

What? No. If someone wants to dig I'll supervise, but otherwise?

[ noooo. ]

Although-- is it one request overall, or one per each one of you? [ loop holes? ]

[mygod]

[ flatly: ]

Oh, you do have some cheek on you. One overall. We do communicate. [ no trying to ask dad because mom says no. ]

[haematocritical]

[ shoots nu ]

Oh, my apologies for not being quite as entertaining after the whole kidnap and monster cult sacrifice thing. I’ll do better next time.

[ awwwww. he does nod though. ]

Better than nothing.

[mygod]

[ LISTEN......

coolly: ]

Please do. If we must be called out here like this, I'd at least like to be entertained a little.