audience: astarion

[mygod]

Comments

[mygod]

[ they consider this rhetorical question a moment. ]

I would start by... spending time with my friends.

[haematocritical]

[ what the fuck is a friend. ]

… Hm.

Without the threat of elder brains and vampiric sires nipping at my heels? That sounds almost too relaxing. [ he is not being serious. ]

[mygod]

[ exactly. ]

Rest assured, those are just the times of holiday between which give you a break from their bothersome and incessant fondness.

If they are as nosy and annoying as mine, then there will be worse things crawling after your backside.

[haematocritical]

[ help. ]

Well, you have a taste of what my companions are like. But to be fair, Lae’zel could be here threatening you to with pointy end of her sword as well.

[ she’s the most charming woman in the world and i love her. ]

But if your idea of a holiday is running around after an Elder brain, my dear, you might want to reassess your take on the word.

[mygod]

I would love to see her try.

[ it would be funny. ]

It isn't a holiday I would desire, no, but definitely one I could see those all getting caught up in and dragging to my doorstep unannounced.

[haematocritical]

Oh, she would!

[ it would be funny. ] It’s delightful. Head of rock.

Ah, I see. You’re stuck in the whirlwind of someone else’s shenanigans.

[mygod]

It's more satisfying to crush the windpipe of those types.

[ a resigned but demure sigh. ]

When am I not lately?

[haematocritical]

Oh, she’ll be fine. She’s going through a crisis of faith right now. Although it’s doing wonders for her attitude, at least.

[ don’t talk about a woman’s crisis like this. ]

… [ looks around. shrugs. ] Well, I can’t speak for this as I didn’t exactly sign up for it. But how did you end up in this situation?

[mygod]

If only more of my people would experience a little of that.

[ gripey ]

I joined on my own because I wanted to see if it was possible to complete such an imaginative ritual. I find it doubtful.

[haematocritical]

I don't think she'd agree with you. The way she agonised was quite something.

[ hmm. he folds his arms. ]

And? [ ... ] Could've joined it more intimately if you were so interested. [ get sacrificed, nerd. ]

[mygod]

[ tch ]

No, thank you. Some of us need to be in a position to obtain information.

Though I have considered the leadership of the cult may attempt to sacrifice most of the rest of us if needed.

It just seems like something they would do.

[haematocritical]

You know you really have a way of tilting the conversation to misery and doom. It's quite charming in the worst way.

[ stop that. ]

[mygod]

[ they sort of flick a hand as if to say SUE THEM ]

I'm pragmatic after Nehan's death. Someone has to be.

[haematocritical]

[ sues him. ]

You also just told me you half expect everyone to die, yourself included. [ but, hm. ] I’m assuming there weren’t any signs something was going to happen to him? No… terse messages from your superiors? Outright threats or warnings?

[mygod]

There were no signs, but why would leadership of a cult give away their plans to kill one of their members?

I just understand they will do whatever they believe it takes to make this process succeed.

[haematocritical]

So no being surprised if we stumble over your corpse one day.

[ noted. ]