There is always the whole universe now, if you ever care to look around.
[ scien will just look out at the ocean, and think of his own island. it's another body of water, and yet so different from what he'd seen for the past hundred years ]
I don't know where I'll head after this. Maybe I'll stop by wherever you all are.
Why wouldn't we? We already know it's possible, so it is just a matter of harnessing it for ourselves.
[ it's probably insane to just say things like this so casually. 'interdimensional travel? no problem.' but that's what scien brofiise wakes up and thinks about, instead of idk. breakfast.
anyway his answer is similarly simple as he looks up at her, raising a brow ]
[it's kind of bracing, though, to think that he's just got it under control. she'll be thinking about it a few days later, sitting on the edge of a boardwalk, digging her nails into her thigh to stop herself from doing something horrible.
he says it so casually, like it's easy, and she believes him! she believes him.
a little smile at him, when he looks up.]
Okay. [...] I don't want to, then. I like having you around.
I think I will be too? I think I've got the capacity to be fine anywhere, but I think I want to be more than just fine. [she looks back over the ocean again.]
If I can see all of you again, I think I can manage that. All the people I've grown to love here, including you.
[ he understands it in theory. he knows people who are pitifully in love with each other. but to apply it so broadly, to say that it's something that can be felt in such a short time... it escapes his understanding ]
I don't know. Warm. Good. It feels... like trusting that someone is going to be there. For you, with you. It's like when you get someone who never laughs to giggle at a joke you made, or when they bring you food you mentioned you liked ages ago. It's big. Like - here.
[she puts a hand on her chest. over the engine.]
It feels like when you take a deep breath and have all that air in your lungs, that one second where it feels really good and present? It's that, but as a feeling. It's part of being alive, for me.
[ though he does pause to think about the rest of it ]
... I don't know if I can feel that. At the very least, I know that I cannot feel it the same as you do.
[ with an open heart, for so many people, and so easily. scien is dedicated, patient and sometimes even kind to the people he chooses but he never ends up with more people than he can count one hand—whether because of his own tendencies to be a recluse or people's unwillingness to understand him ]
For most of my existence, my body was not capable of feeling most intense feelings, but love least of all. Even now, when my memory bank is capable of it, I don't think I'm a person predisposed to warmth.
[ his gaze moves from the ocean back to her, straightforwardly ]
But I care about you. And there is little I would not do for you, if you made the ask of me.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
[ scien will just look out at the ocean, and think of his own island. it's another body of water, and yet so different from what he'd seen for the past hundred years ]
I don't know where I'll head after this. Maybe I'll stop by wherever you all are.
no subject
[...]
I'd like that, though. If you wanted to come visit, I'd show you around. [a beat.] I don't really want to lose contact with you, you know?
no subject
[ it's probably insane to just say things like this so casually. 'interdimensional travel? no problem.' but that's what scien brofiise wakes up and thinks about, instead of idk. breakfast.
anyway his answer is similarly simple as he looks up at her, raising a brow ]
If you don't want to lose me, then you won't.
no subject
he says it so casually, like it's easy, and she believes him! she believes him.
a little smile at him, when he looks up.]
Okay. [...] I don't want to, then. I like having you around.
no subject
Then I won't ever truly be far.
[ he says it SO easily because obviously? ]
Though I do have faith that you will be fine, with or without me.
no subject
I think I will be too? I think I've got the capacity to be fine anywhere, but I think I want to be more than just fine. [she looks back over the ocean again.]
If I can see all of you again, I think I can manage that. All the people I've grown to love here, including you.
no subject
It's been a month and you're using the world 'love'?
[ asks a guy from virche, known canon where people are just so normal about love ]
no subject
Sure. Why not? It's how I feel, why would I hide that?
no subject
he tilts his head then, mildly curious. ]
What does it feel like?
Love, as you know it.
[ he understands it in theory. he knows people who are pitifully in love with each other. but to apply it so broadly, to say that it's something that can be felt in such a short time... it escapes his understanding ]
no subject
[she says, head tilting back a little.]
I don't know. Warm. Good. It feels... like trusting that someone is going to be there. For you, with you. It's like when you get someone who never laughs to giggle at a joke you made, or when they bring you food you mentioned you liked ages ago. It's big. Like - here.
[she puts a hand on her chest. over the engine.]
It feels like when you take a deep breath and have all that air in your lungs, that one second where it feels really good and present? It's that, but as a feeling. It's part of being alive, for me.
[1/2]
[ ok particular ]
no subject
... I don't know if I can feel that. At the very least, I know that I cannot feel it the same as you do.
[ with an open heart, for so many people, and so easily. scien is dedicated, patient and sometimes even kind to the people he chooses but he never ends up with more people than he can count one hand—whether because of his own tendencies to be a recluse or people's unwillingness to understand him ]
For most of my existence, my body was not capable of feeling most intense feelings, but love least of all. Even now, when my memory bank is capable of it, I don't think I'm a person predisposed to warmth.
[ his gaze moves from the ocean back to her, straightforwardly ]
But I care about you. And there is little I would not do for you, if you made the ask of me.
So I suppose that shall serve in love's place.