Hey, I got into it when I thought he was dead. [she says, with a huff.] I'm absolute shit at it, but it's something to do with my hands that isn't fighting the big drill guys in elysium.
Anyway. You and Aventurine, huh. [THIS IS DANGEROUS TERRITORY TO WANDER INTO FOR REVENGE]
unfortunately he's UNWELL so this is not a light, teasing conversation topic. he has a batman complex. they should just stick with talking about yeehell. but okay. he takes a second to figure out what to say, composed but not successful at coming off as entirely disaffected. ]
[ he makes a little face back. nyeh. he look very tired as he sips his water and ignores that the cat in his lap is now trying to climb up to his shoulder to bat at his ears. he can talk about this with an academic sort of distance. ]
...I just mean he's not mine. I don't know how much you know about Aventurine, but he's someone who hasn't had much opportunity for happiness or freedom. He has it in his head he might be able to find either with me, and it's not true.
Let me put it this way: if you were bound for hell again, would you take Boothill with you?
[she watches this cat do this, trying not to smile at it.
she hums, thinking about that.]
... Honestly? Maybe. [it's funny because that actually is the ending of her romance path, going to hell with her,] I wouldn't want to. But I know he can handle himself, and if he wanted me to live long enough to spend more time with me even in a place like the Hells, I feel like I'd have a hard time saying no.
I don't know if you can really decide what happy looks like for someone else, Nehan. If you aren't interested, that's a whole thing, that's all right. But I know you think you're an irredeemable piece of shit, so I'm not so sure.
he's making such a face at being called out this directly like okay IT SOUNDS STUPID WHEN YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT, KARLACH. he doesn't comment on that bit. ]
...Why would you let him? He's competent, but I'm sure Hell has burnt out plenty of competent fighters.
[ this is a genuine question and not a judgmental one, he is trying to wrap his head around it. ]
We're all selfish. I don't think anyone wants to be entirely alone. [ even with him, he chooses to isolate; it's not like, enjoyable. ] ...Your ranger included.
[ he'd probably want to be with her more than he fears hell. so is it better to allow him to do something crazy if it makes him happy? who knows. ]
Yeah. I know I've scared him, getting into trouble. He's lost a lot, I don't... I don't want him to lose more. [a sigh.] You just choose what's more important to you, I guess.
Sometimes protecting someone isn't the right move.
Is it not...? [ that's usually what he opts to do, but... maybe it's a little (a lot) inconsiderate of their feelings. ] ...Considering how many times you've come back to life, I think he should consider himself lucky. He's with the most indestructible person I've ever seen.
[ this is a joke mostly but he's not too worried about them losing each other. they're both insanely tough. ]
[it's usually what she defaults to, protecting people, and then a bunch of people here smacked her against the side of her head and were like hey! knock it off! so now she thinks about it.
that last bit makes her laugh a little, though.]
Think we're a good combination. I'm hard to kill and he's even worse. [robots...] Anyway - I won't pester you. But I know you care, and I think you're trying to protect people from how horrible you think you are and that's silly.
Maybe you're protecting yourself from having something nice and having it taken from you. Guess I understand that one too.
his expression is unreadable, but there is some emotional math lady memeing happening. ]
I'm sure you do. [ he's sure she, of all people, would understand what it's like to lose things and readjust to having something of her own again. ] ...You're not pestering. Thank you for the perspective.
[ he has no idea what he's doing. ]
I didn't expect eight weeks to turn into something so complex.
[her tank instincts were not enough to stop your ass from getting destroyed ig you cannot imagine the restraint i am putting in to not audience you at 8:30 pst on a thursday]
Isn't it fucked up? [she says cheerfully, taking a drink.] But it's part of being alive. Messy and complex, good and bad.
You're welcome, though. Thank you for not snapping at me, it's a refreshing change from most people.
[ listen we have to respect a 1 around here, also audience me always flurry i put all our threads directly into my mouth
it is really fucked up though. being a person is so messy. ]
...I've snapped at you plenty already. [ she just tends to stick around even after he's lashed out. ] People get embarrassed to talk about these things, I suppose. I'm not used to it myself.
[ he is cagey, but since aventurine let the cat out of the bag already and karlach doesn't seem like a huge asshole, this is fine. ]
[imagine she just went around and was a huge asshole about it directly after this. she wouldn't, but what a horrible thing to do to someone who has a bazillion trust issues.
she grins a bit at him.]
Your bark is worse than your bite. And I say this being best friends with someone who bites a lot. [gestures in astarion] You do pretty okay at talking about it despite not being very used to it.
Mostly I just want you to know you've always got someone in your corner, you know.
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Hey, I got into it when I thought he was dead. [she says, with a huff.] I'm absolute shit at it, but it's something to do with my hands that isn't fighting the big drill guys in elysium.
Anyway. You and Aventurine, huh. [THIS IS DANGEROUS TERRITORY TO WANDER INTO FOR REVENGE]
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[ but okay well i went and read your pc with yuul and kill you with a big daddy actually. he just stares at her. ]
What about him?
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[do it death is a reward]
Anyway. Just curious. What, you can ask me about my guy but I can't ask you about yours? [this is light, teasing, as she sips from her jamba juice.]
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unfortunately he's UNWELL so this is not a light, teasing conversation topic. he has a batman complex. they should just stick with talking about yeehell. but okay. he takes a second to figure out what to say, composed but not successful at coming off as entirely disaffected. ]
Where did you get the impression that he's mine?
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she tilts her head at him. he doesn't have to be light about it, but she will - because she's not looking to upset him, she's just curious.]
From him. You disagree? [aventurine was like we are TAKING A BREAK INDEFINITELY or whatever but listen.]
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he clicks his tongue softly. it's not curiosity he wants to reward, but it's probably better that he clarifies this, carefully neutral. ]
...We weren't exactly together. But I broke things off anyway. He doesn't have any obligations to me.
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Obligations. [she says, making a face.] You're not an obligation.
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...I just mean he's not mine. I don't know how much you know about Aventurine, but he's someone who hasn't had much opportunity for happiness or freedom. He has it in his head he might be able to find either with me, and it's not true.
Let me put it this way: if you were bound for hell again, would you take Boothill with you?
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she hums, thinking about that.]
... Honestly? Maybe. [it's funny because that actually is the ending of her romance path, going to hell with her,] I wouldn't want to. But I know he can handle himself, and if he wanted me to live long enough to spend more time with me even in a place like the Hells, I feel like I'd have a hard time saying no.
I don't know if you can really decide what happy looks like for someone else, Nehan. If you aren't interested, that's a whole thing, that's all right. But I know you think you're an irredeemable piece of shit, so I'm not so sure.
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he's making such a face at being called out this directly like okay IT SOUNDS STUPID WHEN YOU SAY IT LIKE THAT, KARLACH. he doesn't comment on that bit. ]
...Why would you let him? He's competent, but I'm sure Hell has burnt out plenty of competent fighters.
[ this is a genuine question and not a judgmental one, he is trying to wrap his head around it. ]
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silence, and then:]
Maybe I'm a little selfish. [honestly.] I want to live. Always have. Just, in a situation like that, right, I didn't want to live alone.
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We're all selfish. I don't think anyone wants to be entirely alone. [ even with him, he chooses to isolate; it's not like, enjoyable. ] ...Your ranger included.
[ he'd probably want to be with her more than he fears hell. so is it better to allow him to do something crazy if it makes him happy? who knows. ]
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Yeah. I know I've scared him, getting into trouble. He's lost a lot, I don't... I don't want him to lose more. [a sigh.] You just choose what's more important to you, I guess.
Sometimes protecting someone isn't the right move.
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Is it not...? [ that's usually what he opts to do, but... maybe it's a little (a lot) inconsiderate of their feelings. ] ...Considering how many times you've come back to life, I think he should consider himself lucky. He's with the most indestructible person I've ever seen.
[ this is a joke mostly but he's not too worried about them losing each other. they're both insanely tough. ]
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that last bit makes her laugh a little, though.]
Think we're a good combination. I'm hard to kill and he's even worse. [robots...] Anyway - I won't pester you. But I know you care, and I think you're trying to protect people from how horrible you think you are and that's silly.
Maybe you're protecting yourself from having something nice and having it taken from you. Guess I understand that one too.
[ (gojo voice) i tried to summon a therapist ]
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his expression is unreadable, but there is some emotional math lady memeing happening. ]
I'm sure you do. [ he's sure she, of all people, would understand what it's like to lose things and readjust to having something of her own again. ] ...You're not pestering. Thank you for the perspective.
[ he has no idea what he's doing. ]
I didn't expect eight weeks to turn into something so complex.
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Isn't it fucked up? [she says cheerfully, taking a drink.] But it's part of being alive. Messy and complex, good and bad.
You're welcome, though. Thank you for not snapping at me, it's a refreshing change from most people.
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it is really fucked up though. being a person is so messy. ]
...I've snapped at you plenty already. [ she just tends to stick around even after he's lashed out. ] People get embarrassed to talk about these things, I suppose. I'm not used to it myself.
[ he is cagey, but since aventurine let the cat out of the bag already and karlach doesn't seem like a huge asshole, this is fine. ]
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she grins a bit at him.]
Your bark is worse than your bite. And I say this being best friends with someone who bites a lot. [gestures in astarion] You do pretty okay at talking about it despite not being very used to it.
Mostly I just want you to know you've always got someone in your corner, you know.