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[ grits teeth because i want to give karlach a nice answer ]
No. [ his emotions are largely nothing, like the hollow of a tree. an old and tired resignation. some fresher guilt. ] I'm just going along with time and seeing where it takes me. ...Not a lifestyle I'm recommending, of course.
No. [ his emotions are largely nothing, like the hollow of a tree. an old and tired resignation. some fresher guilt. ] I'm just going along with time and seeing where it takes me. ...Not a lifestyle I'm recommending, of course.
[laughing!!]
I hope what he sent you wasn't as weird as what he sent Rondo. [anyway.] Nothing, it doesn't matter. Gale's a one person sort of guy, yeah? So.
You're not very into romance?
I hope what he sent you wasn't as weird as what he sent Rondo. [anyway.] Nothing, it doesn't matter. Gale's a one person sort of guy, yeah? So.
You're not very into romance?
[pressing back against the wall a little...]
Suguru's corpse. [wheeze.]
Suguru's corpse. [wheeze.]
[shakes him upside down and RATTLES HIS BONES]
Okay, Daan. [jesus] You ought to make some goals. Or I'll make them for you, and you won't like that very much, I bet.
Okay, Daan. [jesus] You ought to make some goals. Or I'll make them for you, and you won't like that very much, I bet.
It probably wasn't, I assure you.
[FUCKING GETO!!!!!! Anyway, a rise of fluster happens again. WHY WOULD YOU IMPLY THERE COULD BE MORE THAN ONE PERSON? The idea makes him really embarrassed. Hilariously, this face doesn't show too much of this openly.
The swallows gently.]
I never really gave it much consideration... I'd rather... get to know someone well before that, but it is difficult to do when... you do not have friends.
[When you are too slow burn normally.]
[FUCKING GETO!!!!!! Anyway, a rise of fluster happens again. WHY WOULD YOU IMPLY THERE COULD BE MORE THAN ONE PERSON? The idea makes him really embarrassed. Hilariously, this face doesn't show too much of this openly.
The swallows gently.]
I never really gave it much consideration... I'd rather... get to know someone well before that, but it is difficult to do when... you do not have friends.
[When you are too slow burn normally.]
[ESSEK I CAN'T STAND YOU
a beat, and then she wanders over to him and takes his hands.]
First of all - we are friends. [she tells him, firmly.] I'm not going to kiss you for a lot of reasons, but we are friends.
Second of all, you've got more than you think. People here love you.
a beat, and then she wanders over to him and takes his hands.]
First of all - we are friends. [she tells him, firmly.] I'm not going to kiss you for a lot of reasons, but we are friends.
Second of all, you've got more than you think. People here love you.
[LISTEN!! IT ISN'T HIS FAULT! HE HAS SOME BAGGAGE TO GET THROUGH. When you're slow, but you're worth it. (Flurry and Beau do not think so.)
ALSO, NEVERMIND. As soon as she speeds over to grab his hand - why do so many people hold his fucking hand, he's so baffled - his face gets darker purple around the cheeks and neck. Shy embarrassment explodes out of him. ]
Why do you and Gale both insist... on... [MMHPH.] I know. I've been told...
I will argue the truth of that, but I meant... at home. Before. Most of my life, I did not have friends.
ALSO, NEVERMIND. As soon as she speeds over to grab his hand - why do so many people hold his fucking hand, he's so baffled - his face gets darker purple around the cheeks and neck. Shy embarrassment explodes out of him. ]
Why do you and Gale both insist... on... [MMHPH.] I know. I've been told...
I will argue the truth of that, but I meant... at home. Before. Most of my life, I did not have friends.
You ought to know better than to challenge me.
[she says, amused.]
Haven't got as much time as I did with the others, with you. But I'm not going anywhere.
[silence, for a moment, then:]
I really am glad to see you again, you know. Without the mask, even.
[she says, amused.]
Haven't got as much time as I did with the others, with you. But I'm not going anywhere.
[silence, for a moment, then:]
I really am glad to see you again, you know. Without the mask, even.
[ they barely have any time at all. and here she is, challenged. he runs a fingertip over the rim of his glass absently: the feelings are something like confusion, appreciation—then resentment, then guilt. it's ugly in there. ]
I'd have preferred you just stayed on that side.
[ ... ]
Even if you survive, we're not going to see each other again after this. I'll probably die when I go back, sooner or later, and it'll be a hundred worlds away from you.
You're not going anywhere? We're all going places. [ it's all goodbyes from here, baby ]
I'd have preferred you just stayed on that side.
[ ... ]
Even if you survive, we're not going to see each other again after this. I'll probably die when I go back, sooner or later, and it'll be a hundred worlds away from you.
You're not going anywhere? We're all going places. [ it's all goodbyes from here, baby ]
I don't. [re: staying on that side.] I got a good ending. My heart didn't explode in my chest.
[well. yet, anyway,]
Don't be so fucking dramatic. [she says, but the emotions are fond.] You can't take away my hope that I'll see everybody again, including you.
[well. yet, anyway,]
Don't be so fucking dramatic. [she says, but the emotions are fond.] You can't take away my hope that I'll see everybody again, including you.
[ HE'S AN EDGELORD he tries so fucking hard and for WHAT, she just sits here and is like haha you silly little nerd have a juicebox
all the bad feelings are still there, but also like. EXASPERATION. have you ever seen a hognose snake violently pretending to be dead but it's kind of funny so people end up bothering them repeatedly anyway. this thing. that's him. ]
...It's incredible how frustrating you are. [ he sounds very calm, maybe mildly annoyed, though the emotions are more like AHHHHHHHHH ] All these weeks, and it's like you haven't changed. New heart, same person.
[ week 0, they had this same nightmarish kind of exchange. even the grief and sadness she brought into this bar hasn't ultimately ruined anything. oh yeah it's w5 i am no longer asking, give me a memshare at some point ]
all the bad feelings are still there, but also like. EXASPERATION. have you ever seen a hognose snake violently pretending to be dead but it's kind of funny so people end up bothering them repeatedly anyway. this thing. that's him. ]
...It's incredible how frustrating you are. [ he sounds very calm, maybe mildly annoyed, though the emotions are more like AHHHHHHHHH ] All these weeks, and it's like you haven't changed. New heart, same person.
[ week 0, they had this same nightmarish kind of exchange. even the grief and sadness she brought into this bar hasn't ultimately ruined anything. oh yeah it's w5 i am no longer asking, give me a memshare at some point ]
Edited 2024-07-20 06:36 (UTC)
[you cannot dissuade her in a way that matters she loves astarion and he's the nastiest little bitch in the world
ALSO I'M CRYING HE REALLY IS THIS SNAKE AAAAAAA. she does think it's funny. nehan the hognose snake... when he calls her frustrating, she just grins a little. not the first time, not the last time.]
My heart's my best feature, I think. Honestly, it's just that I haven't ever really wanted to be the me that's bitter. What a waste of my life that'd be.
[which, by the way, he can see the bitter part of her! yay!]
ALSO I'M CRYING HE REALLY IS THIS SNAKE AAAAAAA. she does think it's funny. nehan the hognose snake... when he calls her frustrating, she just grins a little. not the first time, not the last time.]
My heart's my best feature, I think. Honestly, it's just that I haven't ever really wanted to be the me that's bitter. What a waste of my life that'd be.
[which, by the way, he can see the bitter part of her! yay!]
[closes them. silence.]
No. [which is... a relief.]
No. [which is... a relief.]
[STOP I LIKE YOUR ESSEK I JUST DON'T LIKE FANDOM'S ESSEK beau is stupid though yeah]
Well, it's never too late to change all that. [she says, amused.] You've made some friends here, so take that and do good when you're back home.
You're not a quitter, I know that. And I think you don't really want to be alone, or you would never talk to me.
Well, it's never too late to change all that. [she says, amused.] You've made some friends here, so take that and do good when you're back home.
You're not a quitter, I know that. And I think you don't really want to be alone, or you would never talk to me.
Sort of does, doesn't it.
[snorts.]
Astarion's bad at feelings in general. I don't blame him, he's got his reasons. But I think half the time he doesn't realize how loved he is.
[snorts.]
Astarion's bad at feelings in general. I don't blame him, he's got his reasons. But I think half the time he doesn't realize how loved he is.
[turns him into fandom essek
OK, STOP TALKING ABOUT IT. He continues to stay sort of flustered. His hands worry themselves in a way against hers.]
....
[He glances anywhere but her at the last part. He doesn't gotta look, the vibes tell her everything she needs to know.]
That's not...
[gives up so quickly]
OK, STOP TALKING ABOUT IT. He continues to stay sort of flustered. His hands worry themselves in a way against hers.]
....
[He glances anywhere but her at the last part. He doesn't gotta look, the vibes tell her everything she needs to know.]
That's not...
[gives up so quickly]
You are so funny.
[she says, amused. she lets go of his hands, but only after squeezing them.]
At least you're not nearly as bad as Nehan. You can have that. [...] Believe in yourself a bit more. You can be the magical grand dick of all and still love and hold on to people.
[she says, amused. she lets go of his hands, but only after squeezing them.]
At least you're not nearly as bad as Nehan. You can have that. [...] Believe in yourself a bit more. You can be the magical grand dick of all and still love and hold on to people.
[NOOOOOOOOOOO, STOP SAYING HE'S FUNNY!!!!! Stop laughing at his pain and suffering. Stop friending him aggressively. HE'S SUPPOSE TO BE EVIL!!]
I believe in my self just fine.
[Ignores the fact she's not talking about magical capabilities.]
I believe in my self just fine.
[Ignores the fact she's not talking about magical capabilities.]
[HIM JUST BEING LIKE I'M SOOOOOO EVIL and then having a big seven foot tiefling hold his hands and tell him he's cute]
Do you?
Do you?
[a]
I... Yes?
[BUT HE HESITATES. The vibes are he's hesitating and doubting - recalculating? He does believe in himself! At least.............in the wizard department.
In the friendship one? In the not fucking up the entire world of Exandria by handing over two fucking powerful relics of his people (he thinks)? In romance? Ok, like, LISTEN. HEAR HIM OUT. Maybe he needs some work.]
...I do.
I... Yes?
[BUT HE HESITATES. The vibes are he's hesitating and doubting - recalculating? He does believe in himself! At least.............in the wizard department.
In the friendship one? In the not fucking up the entire world of Exandria by handing over two fucking powerful relics of his people (he thinks)? In romance? Ok, like, LISTEN. HEAR HIM OUT. Maybe he needs some work.]
...I do.
[ haha! yay! sometimes the best person you know feels bitterness too.
unfortunately, this hits a lot of very familiar buttons in quick succession. and for having a decent pokerface, emotionshare is his personal nightmare week; he's a little hatched-together house of twigs with no constitution, so he has to brace himself for a moment against the bar in the emotional reverb, hands shaking slightly from the full brunt of it all, the intensity. desperation, fury, anguish. the fear of dying, the inevitability, the stunned silence of beloved companions in the unadulterated face of emotion. revenge that feels like nothing. love, loss, bitterness.
he struggles to find a response as the fog recedes. so he just reaches across the bar to do—something. touch her arm, maybe. it's cautious, but the feelings behind it are of genuine sorrow, a reciprocated aching. ]
unfortunately, this hits a lot of very familiar buttons in quick succession. and for having a decent pokerface, emotionshare is his personal nightmare week; he's a little hatched-together house of twigs with no constitution, so he has to brace himself for a moment against the bar in the emotional reverb, hands shaking slightly from the full brunt of it all, the intensity. desperation, fury, anguish. the fear of dying, the inevitability, the stunned silence of beloved companions in the unadulterated face of emotion. revenge that feels like nothing. love, loss, bitterness.
he struggles to find a response as the fog recedes. so he just reaches across the bar to do—something. touch her arm, maybe. it's cautious, but the feelings behind it are of genuine sorrow, a reciprocated aching. ]
[haha, yay!
this is a rough one, and she comes out of it feeling rough. it's not a danger anymore - she's not going to die, or. well, not from her heart. not from the engine that was there. but it doesn't change how real those emotions were, and how real they sometimes still are. how she's still reeling about someone she trusted more than anything throwing her to the wolves.
nehan reaches across the bar, and she feels what he does, and relaxes, slightly. looks up at him.]
Thanks.
[soft, genuine.]
I fixed it. [the feelings still come and go, though.]
this is a rough one, and she comes out of it feeling rough. it's not a danger anymore - she's not going to die, or. well, not from her heart. not from the engine that was there. but it doesn't change how real those emotions were, and how real they sometimes still are. how she's still reeling about someone she trusted more than anything throwing her to the wolves.
nehan reaches across the bar, and she feels what he does, and relaxes, slightly. looks up at him.]
Thanks.
[soft, genuine.]
I fixed it. [the feelings still come and go, though.]
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